it is these painful

moments of missing

that smother

the heart the most.

with crushing intensity

the memories flood

and suffocate.

it is a suffering

of feeling alone.

abandoned.

there is the desire

of losing oneself

in the nostalgic swim of

memories ….

as they ebb and flow

whispering lies

about my worth…

causing a momentary

stage of ‘forgetting’

that it is precisely where

these tinges of pain

were birthed.

wavering, we are tempted

to allow ourselves

to be lulled

into going back.

to those carefree

sounds of laughter

and friendship bonds

that seemed strong.

but the facade has been

revealed…

too much has changed.

bridges set aflame

with words

and burned.

revealing an angry truth.

insults hurled

over boundaries

that never should

had been crossed.

there will be no laughter

going back.

it is a forward,

narrow path.

walked alone.

in weakness,

without strength.

but the Lord

is rich in His Mercy.

and though

the path leads deep into

the darkest of nights.

my Faith prescribes

that i trust

in His Promise

of Hope.

i must die

to self

on the inside

and rely only

on His Truth…

His Eternal Light.